Teardrops: the Soul’s Release Valve

            It glistens against your face when the light reaches the small spot it occupies.  It has no smell or sound in the regular sense, but if you listen closely, you may hear volumes.  It tastes of salt, sometimes bitter sometimes not.  The touch is so slight it is often missed, but the sight of teardrops is always noticed.

            Teardrops and dew drops are very similar in that they are both water formed in small droplets. They both are the result of an action causing the droplets to form.  They can form during all seasons and can disappear almost as quickly as they came, on certain occasions.  Although they have similarities, their differences are many.  Teardrops are the result of an emotion and dewdrops are the result of condensation.  Teardrops come from meaningful thoughts, feelings, or memories and dewdrops come from the necessary change within our weather.  Both are an integral part of our universe and the people who inhabit it.

            Teardrops are drops of saline that form in the eye to either lubricate the eye or fall from the eye as from crying.  This dictionary definition does not give the true meaning behind a single teardrop.  When I think of a teardrop, I think of times when sorrow has taken over my body and the release of teardrops cleansed me.  I personally feel they are God’s way of washing away the hurt and allowing me to hope and dream again.

            Teardrops are made of salty water, shaped in a circular form.  The fact they are salt is significant to the body, but not significant outside the body.  The circular form develops into a drop as it slides down the face.  Because of social history, we recognize this to mean either sadness or joy when noticed. The shape has developed a potent meaning for humans and is used for many things involving emotions.

            I have stated why I feel teardrops are a benefit to me, and I believe others as well.  But, there are so many other reasons that teardrops have a purpose.  For the young baby, who has not learned speech, teardrops are their only form of communication.  Teardrops not only lubricate the eyes, but the soul as well.  They have an enormous effect on watchers.  Meaning the people who notice the teardrops, immediately become more compassionate than they were just a second earlier.  The teardrop expresses more than a whole dictionary full of words could ever hope to convey.

            I do not believe that there is one single con related to a teardrop except that it causes your eyes, face, and sometimes clothing to become wet.  However the pros are numerous.  Without the release of teardrops, stress, anger, and sadness can over-take the body and cause, possibly, deeper more harmful emotions.  But, by releasing teardrops you have washed away, if only temporarily, all of those emotions, feeling relief inside.  Teardrops, factually, do release a chemical formed only from emotion.  This chemical is called cortisol.  If a person does not release teardrops during this emotional time the body does not release the cortisol efficiently.  It is my opinion that teardrops have an amazing purpose for all people, young, old, black, white, or any race or religion in the world. 

Think About it...

The new Busch Stadium in St. Louis Missouri can hold around 47,000 people including standing room.  On a typical game this stadium is full.

If you were to take Busch Stadium and rebuild it 127 times and then fill them all to capacity, that is the number of Jews killed in the holocaust

SWIRLS OF PEACE FLOATING ABOVE

The smell of incense filled the air, as my eyes started tearing.  I couldn’t focus and couldn’t sit still.  I could see the pain and anguish in my mother’s eyes, and heard the silent sniffles from family members all around me.  I truly ached to run as hard and as fast as I could, but my mother was holding me tight, trying to get me to sit still.  As the incense smoke cleared, I saw my nine-year-old sister trying to be brave.  She was trying to hold back the tears that she so much wanted to release.  Like a candle glowing in the dark, she was the only thing I wanted to look upon.  I wanted to will her tears away, to make the pain go away, but was helpless, as was my mother.  Then like the candle distinguishing allowing the smoke to rise, she allowed the tears to flow.  She had let her guard down and cried uncontrollably.  However, with true bravery she straightened her shoulders, wiped her face, and performed the duties of an altar server to perfection.

Now, it was my turn.  I needed to process up the church aisle to show honor to my Grunda, but unfortunately my body was out of control.  My cousin, Jean, and my aunts carefully, with reverence, carried the wine and hosts to the altar.  My mother was carrying me.  If only everyone knew how badly I wanted to perform as bravely as my sister, but I couldn’t.  I felt ashamed and embarrassed as I reached my seat.  I know Grunda was looking down on me and thinking, it is okay, Antonio, I know you tried, but did everyone know I tried?  Then, as the incense rose again, I felt a peace that can only come from God.  My Grunda was gone, but she was with the God she loved so much and her spirit would remain with me forever.  To this day, the powerful scent of incense burning reminds me of that moment of indescribable serenity in the church my Grunda adored.

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                

Peace Be With You, Neighbor

 This thought of loving your neighbor as you would love yourself is not a new concept.
Unfortunately, we, human race, have had great difficulty with this one concept. I believe
if we could conquer this one task, all other problems in the world would disappear.
 I understand how difficult this task is, but then again it could be very simple. If I

loved my neighbor as if he were me at the same time he was loving me as he would
himself then there would be no conflict. Conflict comes about through competition.
Competition to be a better parent, provider, athlete, or student just to name a few. Until
we learn to be competitive and love at the same time, the task of loving your neighbor
seems impossible.

 I recently read a study of the Ik tribe in Uganda many, many, years ago who were
hunter gatherers and peacefully lived together for a common goal - survival. The Ik
people were moved to a barren land where their food source was limited. This fact
started competition for food, thus for survival. The Ik people no longer lived in harmony
and no longer loved one another.

 So, the answer is easy. Loving one another as you would love yourself brings peace.
Just as God loves us and aches for us to love him. Do I think this can happen
universally? I have to say yes because I believe with God all things are possible. But, I
also believe it will take an enormous unified effort. Are you up for the challenge? I am!

Silent Courage

 Courage is one of the hardest things to exhibit and should be one of the hardest
things to notice. Courage is usually associated with the military at war or during some
kind of conflict. I do believe it takes courage to put oneself in harm's way, and they who
do this have my deep respect. This kind of courage is easily noticed without question.

The type of courage I'm talking about is the courage hidden from most people.
Those people who are facing difficult times and always remain positive and happy rarely
are described as courageous. Only those who knowingly put their troubles on exhibition
are noticed. Is this courageous? To one degree, yes. But the cancer victim who
doesn't ask for a benefit is truly courageous. The person who has my trials to deal with
and nobody knows about them are truly courageous. And of course the many sick
children in the world who smile for one day free of pain have more courage than should
be expected.

 The goal should be for each of us to have courage to say our troubles mean very
little. We need not only to acknowledge others in need but to pray for them ahead of
ourselves. Yes, that would take courage - the type of courage only God will notice,
admire, and reward.

Will You Swim with Me?

 I love water, and I love to swim. I am a much better swimmer under water than I am
above. I have not been able to learn or master the swimming strokes. However, under
water I am experienced and comfortable. Many people, like my mom, are afraid of
being under the water. They seem to be frightened of their lack of skill and then panic.
I am just the opposite. When I am moving around the world, in most cases, I am
anxious and uncomfortable to the point of avoidance. But under water I am relaxed and
calm.

 So, if I could live under water, I would be just as normal as the next guy.
We would not communicate with talking but communicate through gestures, body
language, and eye movements. We would always be moving from place to place
therefore developing our bodies and keeping them healthy. We would be able to
discover a whole new world together, and for once in my life I could be the leader. We
would travel together and depend on each other and become confidants and build a
true friendship. We would live and survive because no one would be excluded;
everyone would belong to the group and thrive because of that connection.
 Living under water is a nice dream, but realistically I don't want to live anywhere
without my mom, so either she learns to swim, or I am stuck coming up for air every now and then!

Blindly Beautiful

 There are many things in this world that are beautiful, such as rolling hills adorned
with wild flowers and a small stream glistening in the sun as it tumbles over rocks
smoothed from years of moving water. But even that scene may not be beautiful to
everyone. What is unmistakably beautiful to me may not in any way be beautiful to you.

 I love the saying "love is blind" because I believe this kind of love is the most
beautiful of all things. When a person learns to look through each and every person to
reach the soul is when this type of love is experienced. This kind of love is greater than
one's superficial self. This kind of love is forgiving and ultimately able to love someone
more than oneself.

 The best example of this kind of love is Jesus dying on the cross for all of us - even
those of us who are not worthy. At this time in my church we are in a time of reflection
waiting for the celebration of Easter. I like to reflect on my inadequacies and how I can
make myself more beautiful or deserving for God. I work hard at this because I know he
blindly loves me- faults and all!

Everyone Deserves A Friend

 My mom always says to keep good friendships alive takes energy. I believe she
means the energy of calling or writing or visiting each other can be hard, but if people are
willing to do this, friendship will remain strong.

 In my case I believe for someone to be my friend takes hard work, patience, and a
large amount of unconditional love. I realize it is hard to initiate a friendship with
someone who communicates only through the media of typing. This one thing alone
drives people away--- Not because they have no interest, but because they are simply
uncomfortable with the idea.

 So, in my life, besides my parents and family and friends much older than I, I have
one true friend, Dominica Jean, my sister. She is and has always been there for me
and is the only person who takes time to communicate with me besides my mom. She
understands what a true friend is, not to mention a loving sister.

The Hunt for John Verruchi -- conclusion, part 4

(Please scroll down to begin the Installment story in four parts. Posted previously below)


It seemed to be a long time since John had been to New York. As he was on the
tractor one spring day he realized how lucky he was to have found a family he had
known nothing about. He was amazed at the sequence of events that led him to his
great grandfather's twin brother. Since he left New York in October he had talked
to Elizabeth two or three times. He was also keeping in touch with Charlie's family
considering they lived less than two hours away from him. He and Mark developed a
close friendship even though their backgrounds were entirely opposite. John was so
proud of the fact that the trip was so successful and yet he was constantly bothered by
the unanswered question. Why did Delmo and Dominic part ways never to be in touch
again?

John knew he wanted the answer to this nagging question, but he had no idea where
to start or how to start. Sara was sympathetic but did not have ideas to help, so she
simply remained supportive. The twins, James and Veronica were growing so fast and
were involved in every extracurricular activity at school. With the twins activities and the
farm work John saw years fly by and nothing surfaced to help with the mystery. He had
tried to look up on the computer ancestry websites a few times. Unfortunately, always
reached a stumbling block because of money. He could not afford the prices expected,
so he stopped in frustration.

Many years later when John and Sara's twins graduated from high school and
college, Sara came home with a letter from Elizabeth. Throughout the years Elizabeth
had written off and on, but she had eventually remarried and corresponded less and
less as the years had gone by. Surprised to receive a letter from her concerned John
and Sara a little. John opened the letter with reservation, but was pleasantly surprised
to find out they, Elizabeth, Carl, her husband, and the kids were coming for a visit.

Throughout the years the Verruchi's from Peabody had made it to New York two times
in order to visit and keep connections alive, but the New York relatives had never
ventured to Missouri. Elizabeth had explained that Gina was playing in a jazz band in
the city and was questioned about the history of her saxophone. This had brought up
the unanswered question of Delmo and Dominic so they decided to visit the home of
Dominic Verruchi.

John and Sara were so excited with the news they immediately started planning.
They discussed the food preparations and the site seeing opportunities. John wanted
to make sure their visit was comparable to their hospitality when he and his family
were in New York. Weeks of planning was exciting for the farm couple who rarely had
visitors. Most of their families lived close by. Two days before the New York family
were to arrive, John and Sara were rearranging the guest room to accommodate the
sleeping arrangements. As John and Sara moved the bed they noticed a rip in the area
rug. Naturally it needed to be replaced, So John rolled it up. As John was rolling the
rug, it caught on the corner of the base board and dislodged it a little. As John went
to pull the rug off, a piece of the base board broke off. John was not concerned. He
had kept leftover materials in the basement after they had added on many years back.

After measuring and cutting the exact size needed, he returned to the bedroom and
knelt down to start nailing it on. Suddenly Sara told John to stop and got down to take a
closer look. She and John noticed a cut in the wall making a perfect rectangle in the dry
wall. This was the first time they had ever seen this wall bare. They had not remodeled
this room and never removed the base board. John gave the rectangle a little tap on
one side and the wall piece moved ever so slightly. Getting a screw driver to pry it
open took a little effort and time. When the rectangular piece of wall was removed John
placed his hand in the opening. He felt around and pulled out a tin box the size of a
cigar box. So excited and intrigued he and Sara sat down in the middle of the room to
examine the box.

The box contained about ten envelopes with nothing written on the outside. They
had not been mailed or even addressed. Slowly, as to be assured of not damaging
them, John opened the top envelope. The date was December 25, 1923, Dear Delmo
written at the top! John gasped and started reading the letter to sara.

Dear Brother Delmo,
Each day has been hard for me in this country and especially hard because you are
not with me. Where did you go? I miss you often and hope that you are safe. When
we entered this country on that day three years ago, I was so grateful to have you with
me to share in the excitement. I knew you felt it also. We left the boat and stood in
the long line to enter the United States of America. We signed the book together with
such pride. After Mama and Papa had died we both knew America was our destiny.
But, what happened? As I walked out of the building, the crowd was so enormous and
everyone was fighting to get on the ferry. Rushing to be one of the firsts to get on, I ran
and ran. As the ferry departed for the mainland, I realized you were not there. I waited
and waited for days at the place where they unloaded the ferry, but you never came.
Sadly, I had to move on but it has been the hardest thing I have ever done.

Stunned, John and Sara sat in silence to let this incredible news sink in. The
remaining letters were written all to Delmo with such agony in the words written on
each page. John assumed Dominic thought his brother dead or else he would have
mentioned him to someone. Or perhaps through the years, the story stopped being
told. At any rate, now John knew Dominic's story but not Delmo's. To John this was
enough and so he placed the letters back in the box, repaired the hole and placed the
tin box in Sara's cedar chest.

The day arrived when Elizabeth and her family drove up the long lane to the Verruchi
Farm. John and Sara waited with nervous anxiety, but was truly happy and comfortable
with them just a few short minutes after they arrived. John and Sara offered everyone
a drink and after the car was unloaded and suitcases in their respective rooms, all sat
on the porch to enjoy the day. John noticed Gina had brought her saxophone and
assumed she wanted to play. But, after John requested a song, Gina looking a little
hesitant reached for the case. She opened the case but did not get out the instrument.
Instead she carefully pulled back a piece of the felt and retrieved what looked like a
tattered envelope. Gina explained she was in the city with her jazz band playing great,
great grandfather's saxophone when a gentlemen stopped to talk to her at the close
of the evening. His name was Jack Smith and he was a jazz fanatic. Jack had spent
most of his life researching old jazz musicians. Jack told Gina the saxophone she was
playing was exactly like the one a very famous jazz musician in the 30's used to play.

During the conversation Gina discovered the name of the musician was Don Vicks.
Gina told Jack the saxophone she was playing belonged to her great, great grandfather,
Delmo Verruchi. Overcome with excitement, Jack Smith told Gina that Don Vicks was
Delmo Verruchi. Delmo had americanized his name in order to get playing jobs in the
city during a time when Italians were not excepted. However Jack had found out that
Delmo only used the name Don Vicks when playing music. He kept his name legally as
Delmo Verruchi and married and had children under that name.

John and Sara were glued to Gina's every word finding it extremely fascinating. The
thought that Delmo remained in the city and made a living with music was interesting
but also not satisfying. John still wanted to know what happened with Delmo on June 4,
1919; the day he was separated from Dominic. At this point, obviously, John and Sara
shared the letter from Dominic. Suddenly, Gina still holding the tattered envelope in her
hands, told John within this letter she found in the saxophone case, was the answer to
Dominic's question. Gina opened the letter and read slowly.

My dearest brother Dominic,

I have made the worst decision of my life and now with regret cannot change the course
that decision has taken. The day June 4, 1919 was excruciatingly hard for me. I had
always knew you wanted to live in the west and acquire land in order to farm. Yes, I
told you that it was what I wanted as well. However, I was lying to you to keep peace.
I wanted so badly to remain in the city and play my beloved saxophone. I knew if I
had told you my plans you would have sacrificed your own dream to be with me. I
could not bear to force you to do that. So in order for both of us to live our dreams, I
left you running for the ferry. Watching you run hurt so badly knowing I might never
see you again. I knew you would be waiting at the dock, so I hitched a ride with a local
fisherman on his boat. I am so sorry, but I acted with desperation and thought I was
doing the right thing. I have prayed every day that we may be reunited, but sadly I know
that could never be. We each have no idea where to look. I hope you are happy and
are living out your dream on a peaceful farm in the west. I know that I am happy also
playing music with a group of talented people.
In writing this letter, I am hoping to feel closer to you and hoping you will forgive me.
I have no way of sending it to you, but with prayer maybe someday we will see each
other again. If not together physically, know that we are always together in spirit.


In silence, John took the letter from Delmo Verruchi and placed in the tin box with the
letter from Dominic Verruchi and closed the lid. After over 100 years of separation, the
Verruchi brothers were together again!

The Hunt for John Verruchi --- Scenario 3

(You might want to scroll down and begin this story's first installment in the posts below.)

John listened and admired Charlie's ability to make the saxophone sing. Charlie was extremely good at the saxophone, but what impressed John more was Charlie's confidence to play not only in public but among strangers. As John listened he found himself moving closer and closer to Charlie. As John was about to get up the courage to express his admiration, Charlie stopped playing to ask if John had any requests. This surprised John so much he couldn't think of any song to say but Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Of course they both had a good laugh!

What seemed like just minutes, but in fact was an hour later, John and Charlie had learned so much about each other. John had told Charlie why he was in New York and Charlie found his mystery intriguing. When Charlie's mom came back to get Charlie, she invited John back to her brother-in-law's house for lunch and John couldn't refuse. He was starving!

The rest of the day John spent with Charlie's family. He surprisingly felt so comfortable with them and they with him. By the end of the day John had told the whole story and Charlie's family offered to help with the search. Charlie's Uncle Mark was a long time resident and was very familiar with the area. Mark thought he knew the area in which the obituary had said was John Verruchi's address. So the next morning,after John took a cab to Mark's house, John, Mark and Charlie drove to that address.

John was rehearsing in the car what he might say when he knocked on Mrs. Verruchi's door, when he heard Charlie discussing college plans with his Uncle Mark. Charlie thought he wanted to work toward being a professional baseball player or major in music but he couldn't decide what college to attend. John realized the anguish Charlie was experiencing but could not relate since John himself had not attended college. After driving for what seemed like forever, they arrived in a very nice neighborhood right in front of a beautiful two story brick house. The house obviously belonged to a wealthy family. No one in the city lived in houses unless they were movie-stars. They parked in the long driveway and the three of them, at John's request, got out and walked to the door together.

The day happened to be Saturday so someone should be at home, which was the case. A very nice, attractive lady answered the door and introduced herself as Mrs. John Verruchi. When John introduced himself as John Verruchi, the look on Mrs. Verruchi's face was one of surprise, shock, and then reservation. She could not understand this since she thought her husband was the only Verruchi in the states. At least that is what he always told her. She invited them in, offered them a drink, and then they all sat down in the spacious, elegantly decorated sitting room. John noticed right away a photograph on the baby grand piano and didn't understand it at all. How could a picture of his great grandfather be in this stranger's home? But there he was. He was dressed in a business suit instead of overalls as he had always had on in the pictures at home, but unmistakably it was his great grandfather, Dominic verruchi! When he questioned Mrs. Verruchi about the picture, she said it was her husband's great grandfather, Delmo Verruchi. John explained that he looked like his great grandfather Dominic and both he and Mrs. Verruchi, Elizabeth, were so astonished they sat in silence for a few minutes to gather their thoughts and try to make sense of the situation.

As John and Elizabeth were talking, they hadn't noticed Charlie looking around the room. In this room was not only a baby grand piano, but in the corner was a beautiful saxophone. Charlie asked about the instrument and was told it belonged to Gina, Elizabeth's daughter who was attending Julliard. Mrs. Verruchi was a professor there so naturally this was a musical family. Elizabeth played the piano and her oldest child, Bobby played the trumpet. Bobby had already graduated from Julliard and was in a band that performed at local clubs in the city. Charlie couldn't believe his ears! What amazing luck to be in this home! All because he had met John Verruchi in the park!

As Charlie was gazing at the saxophone, he heard the door close. When he turned around he saw a most beautiful girl glaring at him. To his surprise she walked right up to him, but instead of introducing herself, she grabbed the saxophone and hugged it out of protective instincts. She explain to Charlie, after introductions were made, that the saxophone had belonged to her great grandfather from Italy and then was given to her. Charlie explained his passion for saxophones and John interrupted to reveal Charlie's playing talent. All the conversation had been pulled toward music until finally Elizabeth said it was time to find out the mystery of Dominic and Delmo Verruchi.

Sitting back in the corner of the room Mark finally spoke up insisting he would drive everyone to Ellis Island the next day to look at the listing of immigrants who passed through around the time of 1920. So the next day Mark, John and Elizabeth drove to Ellis Island. They dropped Gina and Charlie off at Julliard. Since the two young musicians had met they had talked nonstop about music and the possibility of Charlie attending Julliard in a year. The two were so very excited about the possibility of making music together.

Arriving at Ellis Island was not an easy drive, but Mark was an excellent city driver. John couldn't wait to see his great-grandfather's name in print. When he called Sara the night before she was elated to hear the news, but like everyone else, confused. John and Mark had stayed up into the early hours discussing the situation when Mark had insisted John spend the remainder of his time in the city with them. Now here they were ready to find out if or how the two John's were related.

Upon exiting the ferry John looked at Ellis island and the Statue of Liberty on Liberty Island. He tried to imagine how his great grandfather must have felt those many years ago. He knew that Dominic must have been a great adventurer to leave the comforts of his native land and explore the unknown. As the three walked into the building John felt the presence of thousands of immigrants waiting in line to enter the land of freedoms. John had long since felt the anxiety he had experienced when getting off the airport a few days ago and he was only traveling within the states for a visit. Dominic Verruchi had traveled by boat to a new country never to return to Italy again. How superficial John's anxieties felt now.

Mark led John and Elizabeth to a group of computers lined against the wall. Picking one unattended, Elizabeth typed in Dominic Verruchi and there on an image of a printed list of names was the signature Dominic F. Verruchi. Elizabeth scrolled down and right above Dominic's name was Delmo G. Verruchi. Both, together, had entered Ellis Island on June 4th 1919. Researching further they noticed that both men put down the exact same birthday, February 6th, 1900. Born in Corgne, Italy.

Could this be? It appeared that Dominic and Delmo were twin brothers! If this were the case, why did they separate and never connect again? These questions had to be answered. But how? As the three left Ellis Island they were hopeful that someday they would know the answers, but for now it was great to know that John had family in New York he could add to his already long list. And this time he would not stop communication!

When they drove back home, Elizabeth and John talked enthusiastically about each other's families. John especially wanted to know about Elizabeth's husband John. Unfortunately, because of an unexpected heart attack, the two Johns would never meet. Elizabeth and John knew that John's death was the reason the Verruchi's reunited. To John this was an amazing string of events!

As they picked up the two kids from Julliard, John felt a heaviness in his heart. He came to New York with nothing but an obituary, but was leaving with a new family in his life and very good, new friends in Mark and Charlie. Soon he would have to go home which was both sad and exciting. He was desperate to see Sara and the kids but felt he had solved only half of the mystery. But still, he needed to go home, and with one important question still looming over his head. What happened with Delmo and Dominic Verruchi?

The Hunt for John Verruchi -- part two

(Please space down to read part one, published yesterday)

As John walked out of the airport the sun glared in his eyes and the heat from the sidewalks seemed to burn through his shoes. Never in his life had he felt so overpowered with fear and helplessness. He had no idea what to do or where to go. People were rushing by him with purposeful steps, not even looking further than their orchestrated destination. He felt like he was spinning and didn't know how to stop. Finally he remembered the list he and Sara made together the night before. Quickly he retrieved the folded paper from his pocket. The first on the list was to head to the offices of the New York Times to verify the accuracy of the obituary. Just as he folded the paper and placed it back in his pocket a cab showed up right in front of him. John got in the cab and asked the cab driver to take him directly to the New York Times paper office. Off they went as John tried to relax in the isolated back seat.

The drive to the offices was a welcomed 45 minutes. John had time to think and relax and call Sara on his cell phone. However, unfortunately, the safety of the cab was soon over and John reached his destination only to find out that the office was closed. It was 7:00 p.m. Of course! Why hadn't he and Sara thought of that? So John told the cab driver to take him to the motel that sara had made reservations. When he reached the motel, payed the cab driver, and checked in, he nearly ran to his room and closed and locked the door. Why did he think he could do this? Should he go home? John went to sleep exhausted, without eating, and worrying about the next day's events.

Things seemed so much better the next day. John felt rejuvenated and seemed to have a sense of confidence. So after showering and dressing he went downstairs and into the streets of New York City. John saw a glimmer of beauty for the first time. He grabbed a donut at a nearby bakery and just started to walk. He felt as if he were in a completely different planet and compared to Peabody he was. He wandered for almost an hour when he found himself at Central Park. This part of the city was absolutely beautiful and gave John a sense of security. He finally found surroundings he could relate to which gave him a peaceful feeling. In the distance he heard music and started following the beautiful sound. There in the in front of a beautiful fountain was a young man playing the saxophone. John sat near the boy and yet a safe distance away just to listen and enjoy.

The Hunt For John Verruchi -- Part One

The wind was blowing as the young man tried desperately to read the paper. He was sitting on the deck of his newly built home with a cup of coffee on the table next to him. Fighting the blowing paper was frustrating him to the point of aggravation. Soon he had to go to work, and all he wanted was to read the New York Times.

The young man, John, was a 30 year old farmer who had lived on his family's farm all of his life. His great grandfather had traveled to the states many years ago from Italy and eventually landed in Missouri. John and his family lived in the very home built by his great grandfather. Recently he and his wife added on to the original home to accommodate their growing family. John had always been proud of his heritage but unfortunately knew very little about the life his great grandfather had lived previous to the farm in Peabody, Missouri. Unfortunately, there were never any written documentations or family discussions about his life before missouri. Somehow that part of his great grandfather's life was deliberately held secret. It was on this day the secret began to unravel.

As the wind ripped the paper out of John's hand, he angrily gathered each of the sections while trying to chase them down. The last section he picked up was smashed against the fence in his yard. He tried to retrieve the paper from the barbed wire, but it got caught and tore in half. The half that remained on the fence, was hanging like a sign deliberately placed there. John looked at the paper before reaching for it and what he saw was astonishing! There in the obituary section was the name John Verruchi! His name was John Verruchi!

John snatched the paper from the fence and examined it carefully. It read that a John Verruchi, age 40, was killed in a car accident. He had lived in Manhattan and was an architect for a major company in the city. He was survived by his wife,and three children of the home. It did not list any one preceding him in death, which John found very unusual. John folded the paper, placed it in his pocket, and headed for the house. Knowing he had to get to the fields, he didn't have time to think about the strange coincidence right then. So off to the bean field he went.

Later that night, when the last of the beans were combined, John was sitting on the porch just pondering over the obituary. John's wife sara came to join him after she had put the twins to bed. John showed her the obit and she was as astonished as he had been earlier that day. For several minutes nothing was said. Then finally John spoke up to say he was going to New York. Sara couldn't believe it. John had never left the farm for any reason let alone go all the way to New York, but Sara could tell he was serious. Never had she seen such determination on John's face. She knew he had to go. However, secretly she felt there was no connection between the two Johns, but she did not breathe a word of this to her husband. Sara knew John would have never made such a rash decision without good reason. John on the other hand was not sure what was driving him, he just knew he had to go.

John had always been a very quiet, almost backward man. Traveling to unknown places was always a fearful thought, and up to now he had never had a reason or even the desire to leave the safety of the farm. What was so important about a name in the paper to make him travel half way across the country? Ok, it was his name, but truly it could mean nothing. If his name was Smith, Jones or Adams maybe he could overlook the coincidence. But Verruchi! As far as he knew, his family were the only Verruchi's in the states. The story was his great grandfather was an only child. Whatever the reason for this John Verruchi to be in New York, John had to find out!

So in late October after the harvest and everything was quiet on the farm, John planned his trip. He had kept the obituary even though of course it was little help. he only knew he needed to start his adventure in Manhattan. Sara, of course needed to stay home with the kids, so John was faced with the knowledge he would be entirely on his own. That thought terrified him! He had never been comfortable in crowded cities the few times he had been to St. Louis to the Cardinal game. He envisioned the streets of Manhattan to be much worse. Plus, he had never flown before which he needed to do. His truck would never make it that far and he needed to leave the minivan with Sara. So flying would have to be the mode of transportation.

John had Sara make all the arrangements because he had no idea how to start. Sara was so concerned about John's going, due to the fact he had always been shy and backward. If John couldn't make his own reservation, how could he possibly function in New York City without her?  Only time would tell.

Finally that day came. Sara and John left for St. Louis. John was flying nonstop to Kennedy airport arriving later that evening. By the time Sara would be getting back to Peabody, John would be landing in New York. John was so nervous, but Sara helped him through the airport which was comforting to him. When they finally parted at the gate, John had seconded thoughts, but didn't let Sara know. He knew this was something he had to do. Something was pulling him to New York!

On the plane, John read the obituary for the dozenth time. He was still reading it when he landed at the John F. Kennedy Airport in New York. What was he going to do now?

Pope John Paul II

The square is crowded with people of all ages, races and nationalities.  Groups huddle together talking in their native tongue, waving their country’s flag.  Soon the window will open and a red carpet will be draped over the window ledge.  The thousands of people will silence as their pope appears in the window at his residence at Vatican City in Rome, Italy.  Pope John Paul II.

Pope John Paul II is deceased now, but through reputation I feel I know him.  He was the pope when I was little and I remember people always talking about him; Catholics and Protestants alike.  I remember wondering how one man living so far away from the United States could have such an effect over us. I wondered, like so many others, how one man could lead an entire world of followers, and then I saw his face.

Pope John Paul II was a small man dressed in long white robes with gold trim called a mozzetta.  He wore a zucchetto, a small skull cap under a miter, a tall white pointed hat.  He wore red leather shoes symbolizing the blood of the martyrs who died, instead of giving up their faith.  On his finger is the fisherman’s ring, that when he died was crushed and buried with him.  When standing or walking he held a long staff as if he were a shepherd guiding his flock through the fields of faith.  He led people by his appearance, but mostly through his actions.

His actions, though very slight in his older age, is what impressed me the most.  When he would raise his hand for a blessing, I could feel the caring and compassion oozing from his eyes.  Even though he was bent over in obvious discomfort, he radiated grace with every step.  I could feel his love for his people, and all people, with a single movement of his head.  He truly lived a life of reverence.

His presence in the world has made an impact on my life.  I envisioned through Pope John Paul, what Jesus was like when he walked this earth.  I truly felt that Pope John Paul took his vows and leadership role seriously and it showed through every time he spoke.  Every time the ever-changing world brought new complications, Pope John Paul never lost his hope.  Hope is what sustained him and hope is what he gave to me.

The Medici

Rome was made up of many city-states that controlled themselves with their own government.  The wealthy and those with ability mattered more than the aristocrats.  Merchants and bankers replaced nobility in the upper class.  Middle class was the poor workers and the lowest class was peasants.

The art and architecture changed to more realistic art and more colorful.  The artist concerned themselves to everyday life and did not paint only religious themes.  The architecture went back to classical using domes instead of spires.  They wanted beauty and comfort.

 The Medici wanted to benefit all of Florence to keep their trust in the Medici family, keeping them in power. This made Florence prosper to entice people to move to Florence. 

 Italy held onto classical traditions which led its way to attracting artists and the progression of their field.  Also Italy had avoided the economic crisis.  These thoughts and ideas spread quickly through Europe.  Art became so important that the Catholic Church suffered, losing track of their mission, which led to the breaking away from the church and forming the protestant religions

Writing For the “Stars”

                                                                                               

The study of stars and planets has always intrigued me.  I do most of my thinking and pondering when sitting outside.  What is up there?  Who is out there?  And how can I learn more?  These questions swarm around in my head constantly.  To find answers to these questions, I need to research the job of an astronomer and what is needed to become this desired profession.  Not only am I interested in the astronomer, but the astronomer who is able to write the information down for all to read.  Therefore a second occupation should be researched, that of an author or writer.

            The astronomer/writer would have various duties throughout their day.  The astronomer would observe the skies through recording devices unlike the astronomers of old.  The picture of astronomers gazing through a telescope is unfortunately outdated.  They at present spend very little time observing and most of their time is spent analyzing their observations.  After hours and hours of collecting data they are ready to put the information on paper.  Writing this information, either for a scientific magazine or a science textbook is grueling and time consuming work.

            In both occupations, the astronomer and the writer, their work spaces are quiet and secluded.  The astronomer would spend the majority of his time in a lab pouring over film and analyzing and hypothesizing.  The writer would obviously need a work space that was quiet and conducive to quick and fast production, especially if the writer was trying to meet deadlines.  Both of these work environments suit my personality.  Crowded places make it hard for me to concentrate, let alone write something worth reading.

            There are many requirements to be either an astronomer or a science writer, however interestingly enough there are some overlaps.  According to science careers on science buddies.org, both require imagination, creativity, and the ability to see the abstract.  Even their high school requirements are the same.  Both areas should take classes in chemistry, biology, physics, algebra, geometry, and calculus.  The astronomer needs these subjects to understand his job.  The writer needs these subjects in order to write about astronomy successfully.  A writer, of course, would need to also take English courses to learn the art of communicating through the written word.

            To be a successful astronomer, you would need not only a BS degree but a masters and a Ph.D.  The writer need only have a BS degree to be a science writer, however I am certain the more classes you could take beyond that degree the better.  Both degrees will take some planning and saving.  The average cost of attending a college to obtain a BS degree is $25,000 however to obtain a degree in astronomy the school’s tuition may be as high as $36,000.  To continue on with a masters, you would need another $27,000.  To obtain your PhD you could need anywhere from $10,000 to $15,000 depending where you attend.  Needless to say scholarships and financial assistance is necessary.

            When deciding a profession, the salary should be of interest to anyone.  You need a good salary to not only keep up with the cost of living expenses, but obviously you will incur college debts to pay.  The astronomer and the writer surprisingly can make the same wage.  According to science careers on science buddies.org, both professions in the United States on an average make $42,270.  This number may be higher than what a writer would make in Missouri.  Astronomy jobs are found in very few states.  The states with these types of jobs are found mainly on the east coast where the cost of living is higher.

            Carl Sagan, born November 9, 1934 and died December 20, 1996, was an astronomer as well as an author.  He had many titles and was awarded the Pulitzer Prize for general non-fiction.  His book Contact was made into a movie with Jodie foster. He also wrote for the popular television series in the 80’s called Cosmos.  He attended Cornell University, Harvard University, Smithsonian Astrophysical Observatory, and University of California in Berkley.  Throughout his studies, he was the first to entertain the idea that Saturn’s moon Titan might have oceans of water making it habitable for life.  His credentials are numerous, but the reason for his success is his imagination and inquisitive nature at a very young age.  His parents supported his interests by supplying him with equipment and materials.  This support allowed him to pursue his dream.

            I too, have an extreme interest in learning about the universe around us.  Will I be able to complete the expected course work is another matter entirely.  However, my ability to write can lead me to many opportunities.  I, as a science writer, could observe and interview an astronomer to complete an informative essay.  Combining my fascination with the stars and my love for writing would be a dream to strive toward.

A Note to my Younger Self

Dear Young Self,

Why does one have to fail or experience defeat to learn such valuable lessons? Do you think God was testing us? Sometimes I believe the events of our life were a test, and God was patiently watching, and sometimes I think he placed the event in our life purposely. Either way he was always there with us even though it didn't always seem that way.

Remember the time, young self, in Green Bay? You were so excited to see Green Bay for the first time and to visit your cousins. When your parents left your uncle in charge, they should have known he was not capable of such a task. You sat in the wooded area for such a long time and then your body needed to move, run, or bolt anywhere and so you did---- crossing busy, frightening streets, and then you found peace while swinging on a stranger's swing. You were so scared your parents wouldn't find you, but they did. This uncontrollable energy stays with you throughout your young years, but don't dismay; with each year you get stronger and stronger in order to push back the impulses.

Those impulses were with you again the day you bolted into the middle of a cow herd. You had only one thought in mind, and that was to get to the pond. All you wanted to do was throw rocks in the pond to watch the rippled after-effects, but you neglected to think about the path of choice. And so a new young mother cow comes charging at you to protect her young. You went flying in the air and landed face first into the muddy, manured muck, which probably saved you from real injury. Your mother came running like a crazed mom and frightened the cows away. Only a broken collar bone, but once again impulse led to danger. There will be many more urges in your life, however technology will help limit the number of dangerous outbursts.

Technology brings me to the next momentous event. You were in kindergarten and attending regular class with a personal aide; your cousin Amy Binder. Prior to the age of six you had not communicated with anyone. Through the technology of television, Amy learned of communicating through facilitation. This was a major turning point in your life. Up until then you had been a son, a grandson and a brother but not a person with normal wants and needs. Through facilitation your whole life changes. You become not only a person but a person with a purpose beyond taking up space.

I know if you had what you wanted back then, you would have chosen Amy to be your personal aide for life, but God had other plans. You were unforgiving to the number of aides you had after Amy, and each of them left for one reason or another. Finally, after depleting your sources of qualified aides, your mom took over---temporarily was the plan. However, your school life blossomed the very day she was at your side. And you, blessed young self, will still find her there in the future helping you establish a very respected academic status.

Your life has been full of complications, but you remained happy and hopeful throughout. But no one is ever spared sadness, and yours came too soon and too close together. You lost your maternal grandparents within one year of each other. You were very distraught over losing such an important part of your personal support system. Next to your parents and sister, Grunda and Papa were two of the few people who loved you despite your inability to perform like other children. They loved you completely and you felt that loss deeply. Yes, it happened too soon, and you will miss them always, but on occasion in the quiet of your room you will feel their presence and will know through God, they will never really leave your side.

The year after Grunda and Papa died you had the great pleasure to live in their house for 18 months. Your mom and dad had sold the house on Highway C and were building on the Adams Farm. you were very sad to leave the only house you had ever lived in, but spending 18 months in Grunda and Papa;'s house was a wonderful experience. Your family had always had so much space to escape from each other before, but at Grunda's you were blissfully right by each other's side. You all enjoyed this time of closeness, and this made your transition from familiar to unfamiliar easier. You will fully enjoy your new home and will adapt easily, but I know you were given that blessed year at Grunda's as a present from God.

God continues in your life, of course, to be present always, but the day you made your First Communion he was there with you for the first time when you ate the body of Christ. The day was intended to be beautiful, but unfortunately all of the days events were not. Your mom and you had practiced every little detail that could be thought through, but practicing with the whole congregation was impossible. so when it was your time to receive the body of Christ for the first time, your dad had to carry you to the priest because you would not move. Remember your mom crying after mass? You felt so badly for her, but she didn't understand. Today she has learned so much more about your disability, and between the two of you, you learn to handle uncomfortable situations much better.

One of your very favorite things to do is swim, and that remains true still today. After moving into your new home on the hill on the Adams Farm, your parents decide to buy a large pool, mainly for you. That pool was extremely exciting for you. You learned to swim quickly and spent many, many hours in the pool. Remember the pool parties with family and friends? You always felt so different during those times. Most all the time other children avoid contact with you, but in the pool it is different. In the pool you were able to interact with them, and they in turn were surprised to be interacting with you. The pool was always the place where you were less different and more on an equal level. You will always have the pool in your life, but unfortunately the other friends and family have outgrown the pool. Don't worry, the water is still calming to you and is always a place where you get to be free of your disability.

Being free of your disability is much harder when traveling. In the early days of traveling things were very difficult for you. Car doors had to be chained so you wouldn't bolt out, and then there were child locks. Mama had to bring hot plates to motels to cook your food and then you learned to eat something that didn't require cooking. Finally due to your dad's never ending desire to buy something new, we bought a camper. This one expenditure changed the whole course of travel for you. The number of trips you have taken with your family is too many to mention. But you know none of them would have happened if not for the camping lifestyle. Your family luckily enjoys this mode of travel as well so it is a perfect match---- one of those God orchestrated things I'm sure. The security you feel in the camper allows you to venture out during the day knowing you will feel safe and secure when the day's sightseeing is done. Traveling this way will not change in the future for you, and because of your families willingness to compromise you are able to see sights that most people with your disability don't even dream about.

Everyone has dreams and of course you are no exception. You may have different dreams than most children your age, but I know there are a few that are comparable. One dream you were able to live was not only being on the academic bowl team at your school in Bevier, but actually being able to play. You were so nervous that day when your coach allowed you to play the game. You knew you could help the team if you could only make yourself sit still in the chair. Well, you sat. Not so quietly, but you did sit. The spectators and the other team were truly gracious and kind, and they overlooked your uncontrollable noises. It was hard for you to buzz in on questions faster than everyone else, so you simply waited. Then it happened. A question was asked, and no one knew the answer. You buzzed in, and with facilitation you answered correctly. Not only did your team applaud, but the entire room, as well, including your opponents. The sense of acceptance was great that day. And from that day forward other students have much more respect for you. This respect and acceptance will follow you through your school years. You will be rewarded with awards for your academic achievements but more importantly rewarded with the knowledge that the people in Bevier Public School accept you and recognize you as their equals in the academic world to be equals on any level was one of your dreams come true.

So, young self, whether God placed all of these incidents in our path or not is really irrelevant. These obstacles helped you to become what you are today. and what we have become is a recognized student, a published author and above all a believer--- belief in God of course, but also a belief that He has been with us through it all.

Keep following, I'll be there,

The Older One

Strength Equals Success

The strongest people I know are people who have struggled in some way in their lives.  I love this statement because I believe this relates to me more than anything in this world.  I believe that if a person is faced with struggles and complications and uses God to help him through, he can find the answer to anything and succeed.  The problems we face force us to continually better ourselves within our own life and the life we have with God.  I have had my share of problems that I have had to work on daily, and I believe I am a better and more caring person because of those problems.  Because I experience difficulties, I have more sympathy for others with problems.  I find I want to help others more because I think I should share my successes with others.  All of this is reason to believe that I grow stronger each day because I am faced with struggles and complications.

I think those people who fly through life facing no major stumbling blocks, expect the best in all situations, and when that doesn't happen, they just quit, or move on.  They have always had things easy, so they have not forced themselves to be better.  They really have no idea how great they can be because they have not pushed themselves.  If they were to stumble and fall, they would see what they are made of.

We, as a human race, believe we are weaker than we really are, and there are examples of strength all around us.  Temple Grandin was diagnosed severely autistic in a day when no one knew what it was let alone what to do for it.  Now, because of her persistence she is not only successful but admired and revered.

On a smaller scale, my grandfather, Fred Adams, was forced to work at a very young age to support his recently divorced mother.  He worked and lived away from home at the age of 12.  Later in his life he became a successful husband, father and grandfather with pride in everything he owned.  He had struggled but had become stronger and passed his work ethic on to everyone he knew.  He was never angry about his struggles probably because he knew that is the reason for his success.

I believe that my mother struggles every day but those around us would never know it.  She has more strength than anyone I know.  Boy, did her father teach her well.  I have never seen her mad at God for her lot in life, and she could have been upset plenty.  She depends on God to guide her and give her strength.  She and I grow stronger and more positive each day.  Not because life has been easy, but because life has been challenging.

Therefore, the statement, “That which doesn't destroy us only makes us stronger,” is most definitely true.